The first time I heard the word 'blog' was from my friends in high school. All of them had their own little corner on Blogspot and it seemed natural for me to start one as well.
I chose the name 'Stars and a Bag' because it has a really special meaning for me. It had something to do with stargazing with a really close friend and we used our schoolbags as pillows. We were so much younger then, hopeful and naive. We saw at least 3 shooting stars that night and made a lot of wishes - one of them to stay friends forever. We still are now =)
Then I grew up some more and started getting busier. I stopped blogging for a few years. When I returned, I cringed at the things I used to write as an adolescent. So I decided to hide everything and start anew.
But re-starting something I haven't done in a while was harder than I thought. I changed the name of the blog a couple of times and it felt pretentious. So in the end, I returned to this name. Because even now, it matters very, very much to me.
Right now, my life is full of uncertainties. The upside to that is I get a lot of strong feelings all the time. And strong feelings fuel my writing. Words pour out of my fingers like water, fluid and smooth.
I won't say I'm not scared. Anyone would be in uncertain situations. But as I grow older, I feel like I'm getting to know my heart better, and what I just realised moments ago is that, the heart is fearless. Fear comes from the rational, grounded part of ourselves. But the heart knows nothing of being grounded. The heart is where all big dreams and hopes come from.
So this blog is a record of my journey. I promised myself that no matter how hard it gets, I won't change who I am. Good things in this world are plenty, and it's a pity to miss all that just because sometimes the going gets tough.
So this is me. Not all of it. But still me.
Lisa
17 December 2011